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The answer is very simple: Ask him out without asking him out. Don't be. I'll explain. I'm a fan of developing relationships as friends first eventually evolving into romantic friendships, then exclusive dating, then more, etc. Invite him out to do buddy things—a movie; a game of pool; happy hour; a game of Wii—basically, things friends do. Get to know him as a person and open the door for him to get to know you. How do you approach him? Find something I'm sorry, anything that you have in common—the color blue, his sneakers, that gap between his teeth—and strike up a conversation.

Then hit him with the invite to do friendly activities. The idea isn't to seduce him, but to become friends, as you would with any other friend. Don't hold anything back. If they do something that annoys you, have a conversation with them about it.

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Communicating effectively entails getting things off your chest while still staying sensitive to their feelings. Don't let resentment or negative feelings build up without saying anything, and don't be overly critical or obsessive when it comes to their individual personality. When giving criticism, try to say it politely so you don't hurt their feelings. When receiving criticism, don't jump to feeling offended.

Instead, evaluate what they are saying and why they are saying it, and have an honest and open conversation with them. Have a conversation about the seriousness of the relationship. This all comes down to what you are looking for.

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You may be looking for a committed long-term relationship or you may just want to have fun. Either way, the guy that you're with should understand what you want out of the relationship.

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Have a conversation with them about your expectations and don't be afraid to hurt their feelings. If you wait and they make assumptions, it may end up hurting their feelings even worse later on. If you just want to stay casual, you can say, "Hey, I really like you, but I don't want a serious relationship right now. I'm just trying to have fun and don't want to be committed. If you don't want that and don't want to see me, I totally understand.

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I only want to be involved with you, so what are your thoughts about being exclusive? Get over emotional baggage from previous relationships. Carrying baggage over from previous relationships can harm your current one. Throw out old mementos, pictures, and items of your ex to help you get over them. All people are vastly different, and just because someone in the past hurt you, doesn't mean all future men will. If you still are emotionally withdrawn or depressed because of your breakup, it's a good idea to take a break from dating.

Is He Gay or Not? Asking a Guy Out

Another way to get over past baggage is to find at least one positive that you gained out of the negative experience. Be willing to compromise. You threaten the health of your relationship when you are unwilling to compromise. When both parties in a relationship can negotiate, it creates a healthy balance and allows both people in the relationship to be happy.

Let things go and be willing to change if you care enough about the person. Keep an open mind and always show your appreciation for the guy that you're with. If it's in your best interests or helps the relationship, then it's something you should work on doing. Do nice things for them. Think about their desires and what makes them happy, and go out of your way to do it for them. This could be a day at the spa, a new pair of shoes, or a note that you leave for him at his house. Think of what he would like and do it.

Small things will add up over time and will help you create a mutual appreciation for one another. Don't overdo it and smother them. Just remember to keep them in mind.


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Remember to always stay within budget and never spend more money than you have. I had sex several times with a guy who is dating a girl. He says he doesn't like me and that he is in love with his girlfriend, but that he won't be able to control himself if we are alone in a room.

Do I have a chance with him? Every time you have sex with this guy, you are falling in more deeply in love with him, giving yourself false hope. The fact is, you are second-best to him, a backup plan. When he feels like getting laid, he will always know you are available, and when you need him, he will not be there. In a relationship, both parties should benefit from it, not just one.

You deserve better.

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Yes No. Not Helpful 44 Helpful Is there any way to convince a straight guy to have a one night stand with a gay man? It depends on the guy. If the guy is not interested in guys at all then it will not happen, but if the guy is in the closet, or just curious about how it would feel like sleeping with a guy, that's when it would happen. Your best bet is to drop a hint or two and see how he reacts. If his reaction is negative at all, don't pursue him any further. Not Helpful 24 Helpful Unfortunately, you cannot and should not force anyone to do something that they do not wish to do.

You can try to get to know this man better by spending more time with him; perhaps he will eventually grow to like you. If he really is not interested in you, however, it might be healthier for you to move on to a different man. Not Helpful 37 Helpful You can't control the actions or emotions of another. The best you can do is be a loving, patient, communicative, supportive partner, and they will likely follow your example.

Not Helpful 17 Helpful If you're young and not yet sure who you're attracted to, that's fine. It can take a while for some people to figure out their sexual orientation. Not Helpful 20 Helpful What does it mean if a guy keeps having sex with a gay guy and say he's experimenting? Either the guy is just interested in having sex with men and no emotional strings attached, or the guy is indeed gay but still in denial. Guys are often into guys but scared of family and friends so they find themselves settling for just sexual pleasure and nothing more.

That being said, if he says he's not gay, take him at his word. It's up to each individual to choose how they identify. Not Helpful 9 Helpful First off, you have to be sure your friend is gay or bi, or he won't want to have sex with you at all. If that's the case, communication is key.

Be frank and serious about it, but also make sure he knows that you'll be gentle and let him set the pace. Make sure he feels safe, secure, and relaxed with you. Not Helpful 23 Helpful Be approachable to them -- don't make them think you like them.

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